Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Random Thoughts on a Knfie Catalogue

I have been getting stranger and stranger catalogues in the mail lately. I've flipped through pages of novelty birdfeeders, t-shirts advertising Polish pride, and fifty pages of decorative baskets. I don't know how the decision to mail these things to me is made, but they do make quick disposable reading. Today after receiving a catalogue for knives a few questions came to mind.

First, having a commemorative knife made in your honor is the best sign that you've made it. The first page of the catalogue today featured a whole set of Johnny Cash knives. If I ever need to stab a man in Reno just to watch him die, I know which knife to use now.
Secondly, apparently it's ok to sell all manner of Nazi and Confederate paraphenalia if you refer to them as "historical artifacts." I find this more than a little disconcerning, and have trouble accepting that SS daggers are mostly bought by historians.
Lastly, one of the Swiss army knives featured had over thirty tools. One of the tools featured was referred to as a "medical spatula," so apparently if one buys this knife and can't find a rolled up dollar bill or a key they are still prepared. I always had enough trouble getting the knife blade out on those things.

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